Shamanic Readings (in Fitchburg, MA)

Yes, I do give readings and spiritual counseling for people, under certain circumstances. I am experienced with doing readings for and counseling folks from all manner of backgrounds, religions, and lifestyles, for just about any issue. I am especially appropriate to read for folks who have unusual spiritual practices involving the Gods and spirits, or do serious energy work, or have alternative sexual practices, because these demographics tend to have trouble finding readers and counselors who can serve them nonjudgmentally. However, even if you're just an average joe/jane, I can certainly work with you. I also do relationship readings, for any sort of relationship. But these are the rules; please read them before you contact me about a reading.

PLEASE NOTE: I don't do this for "entertainment purposes". I do this for religious purposes. If the only reason you want a reading is because you think it would be fun, you don't need my services. I don't do parties, or parlor tricks.

1) Readings take place at my office in Fitchburg, MA. I don't travel to you, except in exceptionally special circumstances where a housecall is essential. ("I don't have a car and can't afford a train ticket" does not count as a special circumstance. "I'm bedridden with a severe and prolonged illness" might.) My office is at the Back-N-Touch Wellness Center, 244 Walton Street, about one mile from the Fitchburg train station. Cabs are readily available there, but it is not an arduous or dangerous walk. Occasionally, I go to conferences and gatherings in other states, particularly in the DC/Baltimore area. I can sometimes make arrangements to do a reading there in the evenings, if you come to the conference or at least to wherever they have me staying.

2) I don't do readings over the phone or the Internet. I am not Miss Cleo. I need your actual presence, so that I can pry open your Akashic records, as it were.

3) I have the right to refuse anyone, for any reason. It is extremely rare that I turn away someone who is genuinely looking for help, but if you are just fooling around or you are looking cause problems, I don't feel obligated to see you. Of course, if the Gods and spirits tell me that I have to help you anyway, I will. That is the way it works.

4) I don't play head-games. If you have a problem, tell me honestly. I do not play around with people who want me to prove how psychic I am by guessing their issue. I don't have time for that, and it's disrespectful. Lying to me is also counterproductive, just like lying about your symptoms to a doctor is counterproductive to being effectively treated. If there is something that you don't wish to tell me, just say, "I don't feel like discussing that," and I'll decide if I can go on with the reading without that information.

5) I can't promise you'll like what I tell you. People frequently come to me in times of great personal crisis, hoping I will tell them everything is going to be okay, and wanting a quick and easy solution to all of their problems. Unfortunately, by the time someone ends up at my door their situation has often become quite difficult, and the path out frequently involves hard work, uncertainty, and change. Do not ask questions you don't want answered. That said, you may get an answer to the question that you don't ask. I apologize in advance. Sometimes these things just come out.

6) I will objectively assess the nature of your spiritual experiences. If you come to me seeking confirmation of some amazing mystical experience you had, or that you are cursed, or are engaging in astral warfare, please be aware that well over half the time I determine that these are the product of an active imagination or mental illness. (On the other hand, for more than half of the people who hope the experience was imaginary, I wind up determining it was real, even if they are also mentally ill.) If I agree with you about the nature of your spiritual experience, it is because I have done some manner of reliable assessment and come to the same conclusion, not because I am trying to be supportive or empowering. Most people find this reassuring. I have no emotional interest in either confirming or denying the reality of your experience. I just call it like I see it.

7) I do not provide specific services on demand. I'll offer to provide specific services if I determine they are the most appropriate course of action, not just because you want them. If you have your heart set on getting a past-life regression, a soul-retrieval, blood-walking, or some other specific technique, feel free to let me know, but it isn't as if you can just pick one off the menu.

8) I'm here to solve problems, not provide talk therapy. While I try to be as supportive as I can of your situation, the intent of the reading is to determine the best course of action for your problem, not to make you feel better about it. I will attempt to either help you via some spiritual or shamanic means, or determine the most effective way for you to help yourself (or both). If you are not at a point where you are willing to do what is needed to fix a difficult situation, coming for a reading is a waste of both of our time.

9) Readings are generally scheduled for weekday evenings, some time between 3pm and 10pm. They tend to last between one and two hours, but may be longer or shorter depending on your situation.

10) Call the morning of the reading to confirm your appointment. Leave a message at 978-928-9795 with your name, the time of your appointment, and your cell phone number if you have one.

11) Please show up for your appointment. I generally need to do an hour of ritual preparation before a reading, plus the half hour drive to the office. If you need to call and reschedule, please give me at least two hours notice. My number is 978-928-9795 and my boy's cell phone is 978-906-1449. Write it down. Bring it with you. Pushing the reading back a few hours is generally possible, as I rarely do more than one reading a day.

Payment for Readings

I am in service to Hela, the Death Goddess and Keeper of Helheim, the land where the lower classes go when they die. Hela is in many ways a goddess of poverty, and She has laid strict taboos on me as to how I can accept payment.

 

I cannot set the price for the reading. You pay me what you think it's worth. I realize that most Americans are not used to deciding what something is worth and then paying for it, but that is the way it has to be. If you think it's worth nothing, you can tell me that and I will accept your payment without comment, because that's the geas She's laid on me. If you are very poor and only have a carrot and two bucks in your pocket, that's fine. Part of the taboo is that I am meant to be accessible to people regardless of their poverty. That's important to Hela. I will accept anything you give me graciously, because it's my job.

I cannot accept any money for myself for any reading. If you decide to give me cash, I donate 100% of it to my church, the First Kingdom Church of Asphodel, which is raising money for a chapel. This is, of course, greatly appreciated by the church. On the other hand, if it is important to you that I get some kind of personal benefit from your payment, there are things that I can accept. Basically, I can accept and keep the types of things an ancient tribal shaman might have been given by the tribe that was supporting him, or a modern equivalent. Money, according to Hela, does not count as the symbolic equivalent of anything worthwhile. (I can accept money for writing, public speaking, herbal treatment, crafts, and a few other things, but not for readings.)

Appropriate offerings are:

1. Food. Since I have many dietary restrictions and allergies, if you want to buy me food, buy me organic food that does not contain soy products (including soybean/"vegetable" oil), food dyes, preservatives, or artificial junk. All raw produce must be organic. Meat must be sustainably and respectfully raised/caught. (Seabear is a good place for fish, and Open Meadow Farm for meat. You can order me anything you choose from either of those sites and have it sent to me at: Raven Kaldera, Cauldron Farm, 12 Simonds Hill Rd. Hubbardston MA 01452.) Gift cards from grocery stores do count as "food", because I only spend them on food (a loophole that made Hela grumble, but She accepted it). Grocery stores I shop at are Stop & Shop, Hannafords, Market Basket, Price Chopper, and occasionally Whole Foods. You can also take me or my boy shopping at the grocery store. Please no restaurant gift cards.

2. Shelter. Checks can be made out to Amy Green (my office landlady) and left at the front desk at my office. I'm allowed this because I am basically doing my work in her "tent". Also, dimensional lumber, tools, and certain other building materials are acceptable if you happen to have them - but ask me first. Gift certificates to Home Depot are appreciated.

3. Animal feed, hay, or sawdust for bedding. We have goats, sheep, rabbits, and poultry. We usually get feed at John Spuria & Sons (978-827-5069), just past Gardner, in Ashburnham, MA. You could pick up a few bags of Nutrena sheep/goat feed, but most folks prefer to just make a check out to Spurias. Gift certificates to Petco or Agway are also appreciated.

4. Cloth. Except for some grubby around-the-farm clothes, I make all my own clothing. Since I am quite restricted in what sort of fabric I can wear, the best thing is a gift card for a fabric store. I tend to buy linen from Fabrics-store.com and cotton or wool from Fabric.com, because they have a good selection and good prices. If you want to pick out fabric for me yourself, 100% linen or 100% cotton or 100% wool in solid color earth tones is good.

5. Livestock. I have received a few animals as payment, but please ask me about it first. I don't want to have to find a home for animals we have no room for or money to support. (Rabbits are not "livestock" unless you intend for us to eat them, and we're not really interested in eating "pet-sized" rabbits or guinea pigs.) A gift certificate to McMurray Hatchery is always appreciated.

6. Firewood. It should be something appropriate to burn in our woodstove - i.e. no paint, varnish, veneer, pressed-wood, plywood, glue, pressure treated, rotten, etc. Nails are okay. Ideally seasoned, and in "stove-sized" pieces, not much more than a foot long and eight inches across. (I do have 18 acres of woods, so I don't really need more uncut green wood, or tiny "campfire" wood bundles.) No pellets.

7. Work barter. If you have no money at all or if you have a particularly useful skill to offer, it is perfectly acceptable to do a few hours work around my house and farm instead. Gardening, cutting/splitting/hauling firewood, and shoveling manure are common, but the work assigned to you will be geared to your level of experience and ability. In the Spring of 2012 we'll be beginning a construction project that will last at least a year, and any construction-related work-barter would be very much appreciated. How much work you put in will be up to you - it's what you think it's worth.

Please do not offer to do divination or spirit-work for me, or send me unsolicited artwork or spiritual items.

 

 

Please keep in mind that the fact that I am not doing this to flatter you and sap you of your cash means that you are far more likely to get an honest answer from me. I honestly have no investment in trying to make you believe anything or do anything.

To Make an Appointment

To make an appointment for a reading, email me at cauldronfarm@hotmail.com, or call me at 978-928-9795.